American Mean Girls

Everybody wonders how I get so much done in one day and how I accumulate wealth so quickly. The answer is very simple: slaves. I take weak men like you and put them to work. Everyone has a little job to keep me happy. I have a pizza slave to get me a pizza whenever I need it, a cell phone slave to pay my cell bill, I even have a slave who pays for gas in my car. I find what you are available for and I use you to serve me. Don’t worry loser, I'll have a job for you. I can make anyone into my slave.